I have a problem with evolution. Not the theory of successive generations of lifeforms adapting to changes via survival and breeding, but the concept of evolution within a single lifetime. You see, for me, change wasn’t something that should happen gradually. If something wasn’t working: blow it up, move on, and don’t look back. A long time of that will get you smoking ruins of bridges, a lot of movement, and very little progress.
It seems to be riskier, or at least more vulnerable, to admit that something wasn’t working and we’d like it to change. Because then we’re revealing what we want: what we don’t know how to make happen. Far easier, far less exposing, to say, “This is a train wreck, let’s make it and us go away.
An enormous part of my journey of and in faith has been accepting that I just might have to ask and be vulnerable in order to grow. I might have to loosen my grip on behaviors or ideas from the past. While I’m trying to do this my manner and actions feel awkward, strange, and not graceful. Yet it is likely the most Grace-filled thing I will ever do.